Police is proud to support White Ribbon Day 2019 and this year’s theme of challenging the 'unspoken rules'.
Unspoken rules, like ‘Be the Man’, ‘Toughen Up’ and ‘Boys Don’t Cry’, reinforce unhelpful stereotypes about what it is to be a man.
This can affect how our boys and young men feel about themselves, and how they treat others. It can affect how they approach their relationships, and lead them to act disrespectfully – even violently – towards their partners.
The statistics speak for themselves:
- New Zealand has the highest rate of reported violence towards women in the developed world
- One in three women will experience partner violence at some point in their lives
- On average, 14 women a year are killed by their partners or ex-partners
- Family violence accounts for half of all reported serious crime.
This is a complex problem and one which occurs in all parts of our society. All of our frontline officers see the widespread harm caused by family violence. In fact, about 40 percent of all police time is spent on responding to family violence events – the equivalent of one every four minutes.
Police is working hard, in collaboration with our many partners, to turn these statistics around. We have a number of family harm initiatives underway under the banner of Safer Whānau, which is part of our transformation programme, The Safest Country – Policing 2021.
It is clear that preventing and effectively responding to family violence is one of the greatest opportunities to improve the wellbeing and safety of New Zealand communities, and everyone has a role to play.
White Ribbon Day is a reminder that if everyone works together to change inappropriate attitudes and behaviours, we can create safer communities for everyone.
If you are a victim of family violence or in a relationship that makes you fearful about your own or anyone else's safety, seek help as soon as possible. If something doesn’t feel right, trust your gut instinct - you have the right to be safe.
Danger signs can include:
- Controlling behaviour (e.g. about who you contact or see, what you wear, where you go)
- Intimidation
- Threats to kill
- Strangulation and choking
- Physical or sexual violence
- Jealously or possessiveness
- Stalking.
If you suspect someone close to you is a victim of family violence or feel something is not right, it’s okay to act on it – you could save a life.
- Always call Police if you think someone is in danger
- Talk to family and whānau about how you can help
- Talk to the person being harmed about having a safety plan
- Listen and take what they are saying seriously
- Give support, not advice.
For more information or support, you can contact the following organisations:
- Women’s Refuge crisis line | 0800 733 843 - 24 hours
- Family violence information line | 0800 456 450
- Shine National Helpline | 0508 744 633 9am-11pm
- Shakti – for women from migrant and refugee communities | 0800 742 584 - 24 hours
- National network of stopping violence | 03 391 0048
- Elder Abuse Helpline | 0800 32 668 65 - 24 hours
- Gandhi Nivas | 0800 426 344