Friday, 23 December 2022 - 8:51am |
National News

You’re not alone these holidays - Ehara ko koe me tō kōtahi i ēnei hararei

3 min read

Christmas isn’t always a time of joy – it is a sad reality that thousands of New Zealanders suffer harm at the hands of a partner, parent or family member – however Police is committed to being there to help.

If you suspect someone close to you is a victim of family violence, or feel something is not right, it’s okay to act on it – you could save a life. If they are in immediate danger, call Police on 111. Police is committed to being there to help.

If you know someone who's struggling to cope, check in with them: ask them how they’re feeling, be there to listen. Encourage them to stop, walk away and take some time out.

It is important that people, including neighbours, friends and whānau, are aware of the warning signs of an unhealthy relationship.

Red flags / high-risk factors include -  Ngā haki whero / āhuatanga tūraru nui

  • Stalking
  • Strangulation
  • Coercive and controlling behaviour
  • Suicide/homicide threats
  • Intimidation
  • Child abuse
  • Sexual assault
  • Worsening violence – more severe, more frequent
  • Intense jealousy or possessiveness
  • Use of weapons
  • Animal/pet abuse
  • Alcohol/drug/mental health issues
  • Community issues/isolation
  • Pregnancy/new birth
  • Victim voicing fear of harm
  • Separation

We know the holiday period is a time of the year where instances of family violence spike. Stressors that may contribute to this include financial pressure, feeling less secure about health or livelihood, alcohol consumption, difficult relationships with extended family and other decisions about where to spend holidays.

Violence within families is a crime. It can include physical, sexual or psychological abuse and can escalate at this time of year.

Family violence can feel isolating, but Police have this message to all victims: You are not alone, and there are support networks that help both those suffering violence, and those who lose control.

If you’re in danger, call 111

If you’re unable speak, call 111, stay silent, and follow the operator’s instructions.

If you are in danger and you cannot call 111, leave your house and get out of harm’s way. Your safety comes first. Get to a safe distance and then ask a neighbour or a passer-by to call 111 for you.

Support and help - Āwhina me te tautoko

We know there are people who don’t want to harm their loved ones but are facing an internal struggle. Stay strong: walk away and take a moment so you don’t do something you’ll regret to someone you love. If you feel like it's getting too much, call 0800 HEYBRO (439276) to talk, or visit Hey Bro. Hey Bro supports men to be free from violence.

More support and advice can be found here:

Women's Refuge – 0800 733 843, 24 hours

Are you okay? – family violence help line – 0800 456 450

Shine – making homes violence-free – 0508 744 633, 24 hours

Shakti New Zealand – for Asian, African, and Middle Eastern families – 0800 SHAKTI

Elder abuse helpline – 0800 32 668 65

Outing violence – Hohou Te Rongo Kahukura Rainbow communities free from violence 0800 688 5463

Rainbow Youth – supporting rainbow youth, queer, trans and takatāpui relationships

ACC Sensitive Claims – 0800 735 566

Pet Refuge – 0800 PET REFUGE

Victim Support – 0800 842 846

ENDS

Issued by Police Media Centre

Note to media: If you wish to speak to local Police in relation to this release, we can put you in touch with a Police District Family Harm spokesperson.  To speak to any other agencies, please phone them directly.